This is a very important issue that affects our families and society the at large, it stems from the failure to instill values of hard work and responsibility on the children. The Bibles says train up a child in the way he should grow so that when he is old, he will not depart from it.
When I was building my house, my eldest son was studying medicine at an expensive private university in Nigeria, though he had always wanted to study overseas. One day, while working on the house, I called him over to help with blocking gaps between the planks using empty sachet water packets. After he finished, I gave him water to drink and explained why I made him do that task. I wanted him to understand the effort it took to build the house so he wouldn’t sell it when I’m gone.
Similarly, my youngest son, who is now in Europe, had to enter a gutter to retrieve fallen granites while we were decking another building. I paid him to fill a classroom with laterite, just like the laborers we hired. The purpose was to instill in him the value of hard work and the pain involved in building something significant.
During the COVID-19 pandemic, my children worked on our farm, selling cucumbers and managing our school. These experiences made them strong and resilient. They understand the sacrifices we made to build our school and will not let those efforts go to waste.
In the bible, the people saw the deeds of Moses, but Moses knew the ways of the Lord. It’s easy to witness spectacular miracles, see grand infrastructures, and attend numerous services run by your general overseer. But do you know the principles behind these achievements? Do you understand the process, the price, or the prize involved?
One of the problems we face in the faith is that people admire us and call us God’s generals, but we don’t let them experience or understand the struggles behind our successes. We fail to mentor them properly, to teach them what life and ministry are truly about.
All the young men I mentor know my philosophy on money management, property acquisition, and family life. The results are evident—they are building houses, running companies, and achieving great things. This is because of the principle in 2 Timothy 2:2, which guides my ministry: “What you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others.”
The ways of the Lord can be taught. Prophecy, word of knowledge, healing, legitimate wealth creation, and successful marriages can all be taught. I share these insights with my mentees because if they don’t understand me, they might misinterpret my actions. Those who know you well will defend you.
The greatest need today is to train our children to take over legacies, businesses, family management, and national leadership. We are recycling the same old leaders, and our youth are idolizing and defending them without truly learning from them.
My granddaughter often asks me to teach her about my experiences with poverty. I share these stories to help her understand our journey. If you don’t know where you started, you won’t appreciate how far you’ve come.
In conclusion, the solution to raising responsible and engaged children lies in mentorship. We must train our young ones to understand and appreciate the process of achieving success to avoid costly mistakes. In my next video, I will discuss how to have an enduring marriage, debunking the myth that marriage should only be enjoyable and never endured.
I remain your friend, Dr. Charles Apoki.
God bless you.
