In continuation of the story of Building Like The Ant, here are some more lessons on the purpose of relationships.

    Lessons Of My Life

    1. No two marriages are the same.

    As fingerprints and personalities differ, so do marriages differ.

    2. There is no ideal marriage.

    Don’t attempt to fashion your marriage in the pattern of your parents or friends, not even your pastor’s marriage. They all have dirty underwear and linens that they don’t spread in public.

    3. Marriage is for the attainment of set objectives specific to each family.

    Pa Elton’s marriage had a different purpose from that of Archbishop Benson Idahosa. Rev. Don Odunze’s (Snr.) marriage was different from Rev. Dr. Uma Ukpai.

    4. Marriage demands identification of strengths and weaknesses of each spouse, and attempts made to harness and maximise the strengths and ameliorate the weaknesses.

    5. My wife, unlike some marriages, is the builder and supervisor of our building projects. She has fascinated me since she was 29 years old how she manages to build our buildings.

    She built our first building when a 50kg bag of cement was 50 Naira. Now, it is more than 2500 Naira.

    Despite the 60th Birthday preparations and celebrations, work was ongoing and salaries for our teachers and ancillary staff were paid.

    6. The virtuous woman had capacity, competences, and initiatives, but she had a husband who identified her abilities and allowed her to function.

    7. It is easy to admire a woman like my wife but it takes a secure and confident man to allow a competent wife to play a role that traditionally men are expected to play.

    8. I know my strength and weaknesses.

    I would not have double-checked how many blocks were set or how many bags of cement were used, but my wife does that.

    Don’t get frustrated in your marriage by trying to fit into a mould set by others.

    I respect Lapidoth, husband of Deborah. I doff my hat for the husband of Queen Elizabeth, the Duke of Edinburgh. I salute Dave, the husband of Joyce Meyer, and the husbands of Margaret Thatcher, Theresa May, and Chancellor Angela Merkel. I celebrate Michelle Obama for being able to control herself in the midst of the women who admire her husband.

    Live your life; it is yours to account for.

    We have our own challenges, but with grace, we are pressing towards the mark of higher calling.

    Share to encourage others.

    God Bless You.

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