I’m Dr. Charles Apoki, and as I prepare to move again, something remarkable struck me on this journey. Driving near the palace, I saw Bank Transylvania, and memories flooded in of the financial sacrifices my wife and I made to educate three children here. We converted so much money to dollars, enduring numerous deprivations, all to secure a future for our children. People laughed at us for dressing modestly, calling us names, yet we stayed focused, driven by our dedication to their future.
Raising children back then was no easy task. I remember changing their cloth nappies and, as “primitive” parents, even using our mouths to clear their noses. We put every ounce of care and planning into their lives, providing them with a foundation. And now, in an incredible full-circle turn of life, they’re the ones taking care of me.
Before I came here, bending down was a struggle, but after walking over 10,000 steps, I feel the change. Now, it’s my sons who bend down to help me put on and lace my shoes, just as I once did for them. They open car doors for me, make bookings, and handle check-ins, looking out for me just as I did for them. Life truly is like a cycle – what goes around comes around.
My wife and I used to make all the plans; now, they hold the travel details as we head to visit family in Germany. The roles are reversed, but the care and attention remain. And I am reminded: do not pamper your children when they are young, or they will drain you when you are old. Train them well, or be prepared to face the consequences later.
I was a strict father – very strict. One of my children once told me, “Daddy, I hate you.” That phrase stuck with me. Nowadays, when I do something significant for that child, I remind them of that moment with a note, “Daddy, I hate you,” followed by laughter. Tough love gave them a determined, motivated spirit. I see now the fruits of that labor, and I’m grateful.
Of course, my concern is shifting more towards my grandchildren. I want them to experience life in Nigeria without feeling out of place. When they come to Nigeria, I want them to find a comfortable, welcoming environment that feels familiar. I’ve already arranged a good place for them to stay, and I plan to renovate our main home so that when they visit, they’ll feel right at home. I want them to be excited to come and see Grandma and Grandpa in Africa – to know that we have a piece of Europe right here.
And to those who have destroyed our beloved country, may God deal with you as you deserve. You travel abroad, experience the comforts of developed societies, and yet you steal our wealth, bringing it back to invest here while leaving our people to suffer. God will punish you. To the aides, ministers, and media enablers who defend the corruption – God will judge you. Since I arrived, I haven’t seen a single power outage. The streets are clean, the systems efficient. And yet, our people endure endless blackouts and sky-high costs.
I look forward to coming back to Nigeria, where I’m set to build a micro-community that reflects what I’ve seen here. I am Dr. Charles Apoki, the area grandfather. Join me on the 8th and 9th of November for my online conference, “Becoming a Person of Influence.”
