I am your friend, Dr. Charles Apoki. Welcome to the Church Without Borders – the global church without borders, without schedule. We hold our services online anytime, anywhere. I want to thank those of you who have subscribed and those who are listening to these sermons. God bless you. Please subscribe and share with others.
Today, I want to look at another woman in the Bible. In the last sermon, we looked at Rahab. Now we are going to look at Tamar. We will take our bearing from Genesis chapter 38 from verse one.
At that time, Judah left his brothers and went down to stay with a man of Adullam named Hirah. There he met the daughter of a Canaanite woman named Shua. He married her and lay with her, and she became pregnant.
Let me start by saying this: Joseph had been taken into captivity, and Judah decided to leave his family setting. In the Middle East, even till today, people dwell in communities. You see the Chinese, the Indians, the Jewish, the Arabs – one person comes and others gather around them. They live in communities to preserve their culture, their religion, and to raise their children in an environment that supports their values. Even some Europeans, like Italians, live together.
It is mostly black people that disperse, and that is why we don’t have a strong economic base outside Africa. It is only the Igbos within Nigeria and Africa that really form this kind of nucleus. However, Judah left his community and married a Canaanite woman, contrary to God’s instruction.
Learn this: any time you go against God’s instruction, if He does not help you, your life can face possible destruction and become messy.
Judah’s wife became pregnant and delivered a boy called Er, then a second son called Onan, and a third one called Shelah. Judah later got a wife for his firstborn, and her name was Tamar – most probably a Canaanite woman too.
Once you break a certain law, rule, or principle of God, you usually lose the moral justification to tell your children not to do the same. When there is no obvious punishment, people continue in the same line. But God does not relate with us just to punish us. He relates with us because of purpose. There is a divine role He wants you to play.
That was why Mordecai told Esther, “Perhaps you got into this position to save the children of Israel.” And Esther said, “If I perish, I perish.”
Always stay in the will of God. Always follow His prescriptions. It is easier and less messy.
Now the Bible says Er, Tamar’s husband, was wicked in the sight of God, and God took his life. So Judah gave Tamar to Onan according to the custom of levirate marriage. But Onan refused to give Tamar children and practiced what is called coitus interruptus. God considered it wicked, because God’s purpose was for Jesus to come through the tribe of Judah.
Each of these sons could have been the progenitor of Jesus Christ, but they disobeyed.
After Onan also died, Judah promised Tamar that when his third son Shelah was grown, he would give him to her as husband. But in his heart, Judah was afraid. He thought, “This woman is killing my sons.” So he told Tamar to go back to her father’s house and remain a widow.
You see how women were treated even in those days – like disposable materials.
But Tamar said to herself, “Never. You cannot misuse me.”
After a long time, Judah’s wife died. When Judah had recovered from his grief, he went up to Timnah to shear his sheep with his friend Hirah the Adullamite.
A lot of Christians today are influenced by people they are not supposed to relate with. The influence of the world in the church is so pervasive that sometimes when you go to church, you wonder whether you are in the world or with the Lord.
Now Timnah is a place that symbolizes restraint. It is a place where there are many temptations, and you must restrain yourself.
When Tamar heard that her father-in-law was going to Timnah, she acted.
One of the key things you need for transformation in life is information. When you receive information, personalize it, internalize it, analyze it, and act on it.
Tamar removed her widow’s clothing and disguised herself with a veil. There is a time to remove the identity that has kept you depressed and stagnant. She positioned herself strategically on the road to Timnah.
Opportunities do not wait for people. You must position yourself.
Judah saw her and thought she was a prostitute. Tamar knew Shelah had grown up and yet had not been given to her as promised. She was monitoring the situation.
Was what she did right? I cannot say. Did God punish her? No. In fact, God compensated her.
Let me say something that may be difficult to hear: when the desire to fulfill purpose is intense enough, sometimes God suspends certain rules.
Judah had lost his wife. Tamar had lost her husbands. Both were vacant. There was a legal gap. Judah was supposed to execute the levirate marriage but refused. Tamar decided to act.
She was not stupid. She was transactional.
When Judah approached her, she asked, “What will you give me?” He promised a young goat. She insisted on a pledge – his seal, his cord, and his staff.
Be wise in life. Documentation prevents argumentation.
After the encounter, Tamar went home, removed the disguise, and put on her widow’s clothes again. Branding, rebranding – be discreet.
Three months later, gossip spread that Tamar was pregnant. Judah, in hypocrisy, said, “Bring her out and burn her to death.”
But Tamar was wise. As they were taking her out, she brought out the seal, the cord, and the staff and said, “I am pregnant by the man who owns these.”
Judah recognized them and said, “She is more righteous than I.”
At the time of birth, Tamar gave birth to twins – Perez and Zerah. From Perez came the lineage of David, and from David came Jesus Christ.
Your background does not matter. What has happened in your past does not matter. The wrong name you answered before will not affect the good name you will eventually answer.
In the lineage of Jesus, Tamar was recorded.
No matter who has tried to trick you or mess you up, you must pray:
“I must fulfill my purpose in life. God, let all things work together for my good. Give me the right information to act on. Help me to position myself well. Help me not to be associated with my past. Let those who thought they deceived me be put to shame.”
I am Dr. Charles Apoki. This is our study on Tamar. Next, we shall study Ruth and other characters in the Bible.
Stay tuned to the Church Without Borders – the global church without borders, without schedule.
Remember, I have a webinar coming up on the 21st of February by 7 p.m. Nigerian time. Send a message to +234 80 21 9262 to register.
Somebody say, “Lord have mercy. All things will work together for good for me in Jesus’ name. Amen.”
