Hello, my dear friends, it’s your friend, Dr. Charles Apoki. I want to talk to you today about something important—celebrating yourself and not comparing yourself to others. Many years ago, I went to preach in a church in Lagos. The pastor was a multi-millionaire and a successful businessman with several luxurious cars. One young man came to the church with an old, second-hand car for the pastor to dedicate. The pastor prayed over the car and congratulated him, and I noticed how genuinely happy he was for the young man.
What I realized is this: those who have gone through the ranks to achieve success appreciate the victories of others. On the other hand, people who got where they are through shortcuts—hook or crook—are often the ones most critical of other people’s successes. The most dangerous kind are those who, out of jealousy or bitterness, refuse to acknowledge or celebrate others. They will always find something wrong with your achievement.
Celebrate Yourself, No Matter What
I want to encourage someone today—learn to celebrate yourself. When I preach, I often say: don’t compare yourself to me. If you’re taller than me, I’m shorter than you. If you’re darker than me, I’m fairer than you. You can’t be yourself and be me. You have your journey, and I have mine. Sit on your chair; I’ll sit on mine.
I like to think of myself as a building under construction. It might not be perfect now, but God is not done with me. He will finish, furnish, and occupy me, and people will rejoice with me.
My Journey, My Success
I remember when I graduated from medical school. I was overjoyed. I was the second medical doctor from Otokutu, my community, and the first graduate from my immediate family. So, whether your father is a professor, your uncle is a consultant, or your auntie is a medical specialist—that’s their journey. This is mine. I celebrate my success because it is my own.
Like Archbishop Benson Idahosa would say, “This is our own; it’s not imported.” When people have children before you, it doesn’t matter. The day you give birth, celebrate your child. If others have built houses before you, that’s fine. The day you move into your own three-bedroom bungalow—whether it’s plastered or painted or not—it’s your house. It’s your success.
People don’t know the challenges you face or the sacrifices you make. They don’t see your struggles, so celebrate your life. Be happy about what you have achieved.
Find Joy in Your Journey
I’ve always been excited about whatever I do. Whether it was farming, driving a bus, or starting YouTube videos—some of which I shot in a wheelbarrow or the back of a vehicle—I found joy in it. I don’t wait for anyone to validate my happiness. Happiness is a native of my mind. I decide to be happy, to be joyful, to rejoice, no matter what.
To someone else, what you have might seem ordinary, but for you, it’s something worth celebrating.
Mind Your Business
Tim Walz, a vice-presidential candidate of the Republican party, once had a slogan in Minnesota: “Mind your business.” I think we need to adopt that mindset. Mind your business. Focus on your life. Don’t allow people to discourage you or compare you to others. Toxic and narcissistic people will always try to pull you down, but don’t listen to them. Instead, let them motivate you to progress and do better. Celebrate everything you’ve achieved, no matter how small it may seem.
Celebrate your spouse, your children, your car—whether it’s old or new. I remember my father telling me to jump for joy when I passed an exam. I would jump, and he would give me money. I was his hero, and that’s how we should treat ourselves—like our own heroes.
Celebrate Others, Too
Finally, learn to celebrate others. Just as you celebrate your own victories, celebrate the success of others. It doesn’t take anything away from you. It only makes you a better person.
Thank you for listening, and don’t forget, I have a webinar coming up on the 8th and 9th of November. If you haven’t registered yet, send a message to +234 80 2121 9262. Don’t wait until the last minute because I won’t take calls close to the event. Early bird registration ends at the end of October, and the fee increases in November, so register now.
I remain your friend,
Dr. Charles Apoki.
God bless you!