32 Years of Faithfulness

Avoiding Adultery

Today, the 6th of December, 2017, makes it 32 years of being married to my beautiful wife.

I was a very rascally and sexually active young man before I got married.

I was a very corrupt young man from a very early age.

As I have said severally, many of my friends did not expect this marriage to last.

I got married at the age of 26 during my National Youth Service.

I have also worked with very beautiful and seductive women all my married life as a doctor, pastor, public speaker, and business entrepreneur, but I have never ever had any extramarital affairs with any woman.

My wife is a very religious and conservative woman, if you know what I mean.

In this era of accusations of sexual misconduct by several women against
several prominent men, I am compelled to share my story on this 32nd marriage anniversary.

SECRETS OF MY LIFE

• I made up my mind to break away from the trend in my family, which I did not find suitable for the life I wanted to live.

My brothers married severally and my uncles did the same. One of my cousins has several children from several women.

I MADE UP MY MIND TO TO BE DIFFERENT FROM THEM AND MY CULTURAL INCLINATIONS.

• I got born again very early in my marriage and I fear God and eternal damnation in hell.

The marriage bed, which should be undefiled, is very well engraved in my heart.

• I grew up in a Christian environment.

I was brought up in the Faith in the Church of God Mission International, 39 Umuola Road, Aba, where such acts were not tolerated.

• I consider adultery as very unhygienic and dirty as a medical practitioner.

I can’t bring myself to imagine kissing another woman. I could easily get tonsillitis or other prevalent sexual diseases.

• I consider adultery as a betrayal of trust, akin to stealing from your friend.

• I see adultery as irresponsible and reckless adventurism— an expensive and potentially deadly act.

• I see it as mutual deception.

If I tell a lady I loved her after telling my wife I loved her, then, I am a liar. Love in a relationship isn’t something that can be efficiently and sufficiently shared romantically with more than one person at the same time in a lifetime.

And naturally, I’ve been trained not to cheat people.

• My wife and I have gone through much pain together.

It will be great evil to cheat on her. She took a risk with me when the future was not bright or even clear.

• Being a good model

I love my children and I wanted and still want to be a good model. Many young people look up to me as a model; I will ruin their faith if I commit adultery.

• I take very serious preventive measures, especially when I have quarrels with my wife.

Remember, I am the only carnal pastor who quarrels with his wife. I don’t get unnecessarily friendly with females; I try as much as I can to be always on guard in my spirit.

When I was much younger I always traveled with my wife. Now I travel with a male companion, most times, or I have friends in several cities in Nigeria who come to stay with me when I travel. I always keep my hotel door-hook on and I don’t open my door until I confirm who is at the door.

• MY FACE IS PURPOSEFUL, NOT FRIENDLY.

• I don’t hang the source of my happiness entirely on another human.

When I had quarrels with my wife during the first five years of the marriage institution, I came to realize that my happiness is not dependent upon another human being, not to talk of a woman who has many other pressing responsibilities to take care of. If I commit adultery with another woman, I will still have problems with her which might be even worse-off.

Why, then, would I sacrifice my purpose, which gives me more joy, for 20 minutes of recklessness?

• HIS GRACE IS SUFFICIENT FOR ME.

Grace, Grace, and Grace, alone, is my strength.

Don’t criticize what you have not experienced or don’t understand. Men in this generation are under so much onslaught from “Slay Queens” and cougars, just like the adulterous woman whose lips drip honey in The Oil of Marriage. It takes grace and discipline to survive unscathed.

I still get tempted even at this age, so I don’t let down my guard. I love Jesus and I don’t want to offend Him and betray the Faith.

Please note that I decided to be responsible. The love for my wife is not emotional and entirely dependent on my feelings; it is my responsibility and commitment to her, my children, societal responsibility, and self-discipline.

Sex at home with your wife, even on a daily basis might not prevent adultery. Most men who commit adultery sincerely love God and their wives.

Don’t let your guard down.

Please remember to pray for me and I pray that you’ll have greater testimonies than mine.